And Now For Your Daily Dose Of Paranoia

Ok, my husband is off to chess club, it's dark and my front door is open. Excuse my while I go lock myself in here......

heh heh....kinda hope it gets broke into but ONLY to hear the after story.

Hmmm Jc from what I've read about you I figured your home was already booby trapped and wired with claymores.....

There are already a few around mind you but there are a LOT more now.

So you think boobies broke into the neighbors house?

TL Mair
tlmair.com

and if they get by that they have to deal with the cavapoo's.... Solid security plan Sir

Crikey!

We've had break ins on our street....but never us....3 dogs. All broken into had zero dogs. Dogs are awesome! Just tonight had a young punk come to the door...I didn't open it and when he heard all three dogs he waved and left....LOL

I have a 110 lb Lab who my kids rode around like he was a horse when they were younger, he wouldn't hurt a fly... but his bark is loud and if you come do the door you are going to hear him bark.... I don't think he would do anything to you if you just kept walking but the sound of him would give you pause.......

Yupp, my cavapoo is actually considerably larger than most of the breed. And he sounds a LOT bigger than he is. Combine that with the beware of dog sign on the door that has a doberman silhouette.

The back door, which you would have to have already climbed a fence to get to says never mind the dog, beware of owner sign.

My sign says something like if you got by the dog you have to deal with me and my friend Mr Glock.....

My neighbor now has my number on speed dial along with a very loud obnoxious ring for her and permission to call me anytime she feels threatened, day or night. Two doors down is a lot faster response time than the cops can do, and possibly a little scarier at that.

Yeah, someone breaks into the wrong guy's house then turns around and wins a judgment against said homeowner for scaring the poor burglar half to death. He will be compensated for any and all future earnings in his chosen profession because just the thought of being subjected to those horrid noises again gives him night terrors. In addition, he will be compensated for alienation of affection because his wife left him when the poor, traumatized, out of work burglar's nightmares turned him into a bed-wetter.

Yupp, Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson back up my cav.

Big difference between how California treats homeowners and how Florida treats them when dealing with intruders. Both the self defense laws and in civil court.

I've come home home to an emptied out house -- twice. (Two different houses, two different areas of the city.)

Worst feeling in the world.

Now that I work from home and am here 99.99% of the time, the guns are never out of arms reach. Look, there's one now! ;-)

This state is not friendly to home invaders.

Then there is Texas where I think you have to have a gun in each room by law.....

GOOD citizen Wendy.

We've had several break ins in our subdivision in the past, but each home that was broken into had a field behind them, no close neighbors, I am surrounded by neighbors...don't know for sure if that helps or not, but I to have two labs that like to bark, but they are outside dogs.

TL Mair
tlmair.com

Thanks, JC -- I try my best. ;-)

It's hard to feel safe after losing two HUGE Canon kits . . . among other things.

Yeah, I knew I'd crossed culture zones back in the 90's when I visited a large telecom center in Dallas and noticed a prominent sign advising visitors to leave their firearms at the front desk.

I have 5 pound hand weights by my bed, the curved kind that I can grip tightly. If they come in with a gun, I might be in trouble, but if they have to get close to me, I can hurt them pretty bad.....of course, right now, my back is wracked up so I would have to limp over to hit them :-).

Dogs are actually the number one deterrent to theft if I recall correctly.

Even the little yappy ones alert the authorities that be.

I was watching a cop show last night and they were trying to sneak up on a wanted felon but her neighbors had dogs and it gave them away.

Maybe, if they ask nicely.

Someday, I'll tell you the story of the time I accidentally was carrying a 'weapon' while rushing to fly out on a business trip. ;-/

EDIT to add -- I'm allergic to dogs.

I have indoor and outdoor dogs, the outdoor dogs being rather mean-tempered. No one is going to sneak up to the door day or night. If anyone makes it past the door there are a variety of lethal long- and close-range solutions. This area is infested with evil-doers (cue Jodie Foster's Nell) so the one (hopefully) smart thing I did when I first moved here was get to know the players and get friendly with the more influential criminals. They all like me and I'm counting on that for a bit of added protection.

I knew we could rely on the US to see sanity! At last!! Yay!!..... oh... your a Kiwi Campbell....... lol, ok well done on ingenuity. good idea i myslef always have a stock of buscuits, nuts and snacks of evry sort at hand, never saw them as weapons but now i see them in new light! i might stock up with bedroom plates, saucepans, forks and i sppose if you have the time and the nerve ... fling poo at them, a good slap should do it lol. Im gonna research booby traps. i mean we should retreat, ok, that does make sense, but when u r cornered in ur room and they have a weapon, do u need to wait for them to inflict the wound, be that a knife wound or bullet wound before lashing out with those biscuits? just dose em with your humour, philosophy of life, offer him a bicuit... lol

actually there must be acceptablle weapons for the joe bloggs of today... a spray can, a sound blast, what about tasors? home defence. but rember, burglars are often teenagers, shout out "go back to your mother before she gets angry!" but then the hired killer, a different story......he will be silent, cold, with the conscience of a demon...

cavapoo is a cute dog, a hybrid a the cavalier spanniel and poodle i believe, how all pet dogs should look

Not all dogs should look like a cavapoo although JCs is the cutest one of all

My burglar alarms



Miss Hannah can have her tongue down your throat before you can draw a weapon and Mr Darcy has the biggest feet and killer jump that can severely hinder a mans impending fatherhood.

As for the fella... Ex doorman and champ hammer thrower and tougher than he looks.

As for me? I knocked a guy out recently, learning self defence after an attack so beware all who enter here with nefarious intentions

:)

FART BOMBSS!!!!!!!! has no one thought of those!??? come on home defence people, make em, sell em

I know some women who leave their doors unlocked at night in hopes of getting "lucky"

only in clown town!

Actually, a clown mask on a "bob" would in fact be quite affective for pure shock value. I had one of these in my garage with cloths on for SD practice and it startled me every single time I walked in on it.

http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/product/index.jsp?productId=11746378&cp=4406646.4413986.4417842.4417845&categoryId=4417854

I am considering doing this one on a large metal for Halloween. Unfortunately the doll itself was put in a dumpster in Manhattan 15 miles from our house because every time my wife tried throwing her away at home she somehow ended up on her nightstand the next morning......



ALL dogs in my opinion are cute, even the cavapoo after he has dismembered a giant saltwater croc and is covered in what was once a mighty predator is still pretty adorable.

i know your addicted so heres just a few more arghhhhhhhhhhh!!! (these are well made, i mean, these guys seemed pretty scared to me)

if i had a garden and wanted a pet dog, the cavapoo is the choice i would make! He seems a champ
There was a few clown pranks on youtube that went very wrong, they turned violent! i wont out them up as i think people actually did get hurt

JC, We don't have to have guns in each room we just do. :)

There were a couple of meth heads breaking into homes in town past month. They got caught before they got shot. The most dangerous profession in Texas is a home burglar. And after being broken into several times when I lived in Oklahoma City and having all my camera gear stolen I am now shoot on sight. But I live out in the country and thieves no better than to show up out here. Loose dogs and well armed people are not worth the risks.

One of the ranches near me has a sign on the gate that says this property protected by AR-15. You will be dead before you get up the driveway and buried before the shot finishes echoing off the granite uplifts.

Yeah, those pranks would be very dangerous in many parts of the US.

Years ago my roommate jumped out from behind a door and grabbed my shoulder from behind. I recognized him in time and was able to stop the momentum of my elbow to his throat with an inch or two to spare.

It would be a bad life choice to try a killer clown prank on a stranger carrying a 45.

Yeah, there is the southern mentality and the western mentality and they mix in Texas. I am not sure it is still this way in TX but not long ago it was the only state where it was legal to use deadly force to protect property at night. The law goes back to the horse thief days and how they dealt with it. That law may have changed as it created some uproar when a dude shot a repo man taking his truck and made the shot from two blocks away.

Be very careful with signs like that by the way. Such things can be used against you in court later.

If you have a dog and put BEWARE OF THE DOG on your gate or door, and it bites an intruder, your dog will be put down and you will be prosecuted.

If you do not have a sign, even if you know your dog will bite, you can plead the dog was upset, scared, protecting you..... Otherwise he is just a dangerous dog. You know he is, you put up a sign saying so.

The law can be an ass sometimes

Same with leads that say to keep other dogs away. If that dog bites another dog you will be prosecuted for not keeping a dangerous dog under control.... I cringe when I see people buy the signs or leads

who is the idiot who suggested throwing cookies as a weapon?

With my cooking that's actually a good suggestion

you guys should come to new zeland we don't have any crime except in parliament but thats another story. wee have no guns except for the police and our democracy is gay and robust. our el presidente is richer than your el presidente. my el presidente has 50 million greek olives whereas bush only has 30 millions of greek olives.

actually speaking of cookies and intruders and all things gay i remeber this story about her majesty the queen not of jordan michael or sweden butt england. she seems to have left the door open in the chance of getting lucky at buckingham pallas dallas and as luck wood have it a sicko came in right into the holy of holies. the queen had to put up with this unwanted soon to be wanted man for about half an hour or so. being as clever as that woman is talikng about the queen not the intruder who was a naughty man she thought to herself in the way feminine royalty does and thought god how rude i am i havn't offered this sicko some milk and cookies so she suggested to the sicko wood you like some milk and cookies and the obvious paedophile said yes so she popped out and got some cookies and her bestest of milk from her rather large jugs found deep in the tower of london only a kilometer or so down the rode and forgot to tell anyone that there was a strange man in her bedroom called phillip

for those struggling with their biscuits, cough



and i quote from the cook herself "its the first time i havent cooked biscuits that were as heavy as rocks", so there u go.. couugh, splutter, cough, cough

You mean Michael Fagan. The rest of your story is fabrication but yes, he did break into Buckingham Palace.

Haha Jason!

sorry wrong vid, biscuits



This is the biscuit one!


edit: most Welcome Chief!
hedghogs

oh my god michael fagan was my art teacher in kindy god it's a small world. what happened to him because nobody messes with the queen and gets away with it lightly. good god how the hell did he get into that number 10?

the video about terets is marvelous i love it. to me it talks about the fact of getting together with people who are similar. i remember reading something about these people who think their edward munch or napoleon or some kind of messiah like canaan banana and the psychiatrists put them in the same room and the logicalness of the fact that their can only be one messiah or edward munch or napoleon seemed to have cured some of the delusions for a while. this particular illness dare i say disease (connotation hair) could be quite serious because as i understand it it can be against the law to swear and carry on like a maniac you can get arrested i think it is disturbing the peace.

People round these parts assume everyone here keeps a shotgun in the front room and a handgun near their bed. They assume correctly.

The dog thing isn't an issue here but an owner will shoot you sign probably would be. Cavapoos don't actually bite per se anyway, they swallow their prey whole.

Speaking of guns, I need a macro lens to "shoot" some guns.

JC I think if I get a herd of hummingbirds to keep under my bed, they will protect me. They are quite vicious. They may even be a match for the cavepoo...