Surrender

At times of the greatest yearning
When loneliness obsesses me

I fear the most
Resist all that I have created

What if these dreams are all I ever have?

I fear letting them go
To wait,
To see them come back changed,
or not at all

I dream in fear
That maybe I will receive something
I have grown beyond

I know what I want now,
Tomorrow, however, I wake anew

I fear surrendering to the dreams
of someone I know no longer

I suspect that by letting go of them
I relinquish power

Implied that I believe
Something else knows them more intimately

I fear I may recognize that something,
That power, is me

No longer could I fear
when I would feel truly powerful

I could surrender from myself,
from fear of myself.

Izabela Bienko