I was raise by my mother and grandmother the last time i saw my father i was 10. I remember Christmases with nothing but a pair of gloves uses to stay warm in the winter if you have never been penniless you have never suffered like people that are poor, you have never step foot in the shoes of poverty, you will never understand what the meaning of life is and that it its a blessing....
My grandmother who helped raise me always said' " If you have a dime, spend a nickel on flowers."
All of her advice served me well....flowers have always garnered the attention of my senses and a reminder of the beauty in the world....so powerful a thought when one has little else.
Every day, I got a dime.
For an ice cream.
Crunchy chocolate outside.
Soft vanilla inside.
Mom was upstairs.
To save her coming down,
I got a dime to take to her
To ask if I can get an ice cream.
She grabbed the dime.
Called me a thief.
Beat the crap out of me.
Baby, can you spare a dime?
Does this mean they no longer deal with ..... 1 through 4 ? Now there's a " New Math concept "
5 + 6 = 7
( Anyone who has not worked with the basis of New Math concept, don't worry if you don't understand that equation.
It does indeed break you out of your old associations with numbers. The older you, the harder it is to understand it and " get it." )
Not really a difficult concept. The penny was costing an enormous amount more to manufacture, than its face value was worth. One of the smartest decisions big brother has made in the past several years.
Since I was 18 I've never been penniless - but I've also had times when I did not have money for three meals a day - and been in debt up to my eyeballs. Now I'm only in debt up to my knees with this house. It's not a problem to pay the mortgage - but in the end - I would have to live to be 100 to pay it off - and that won't happen. Of course - the house may fall down around me - the black bottomless money sucking pit that it is. the "beauty" of this house is entirely "skin deep".
At a very early age, around three to five, we come into a Principle which we apply the rest of our life. Although we use it continually in a vast array of ways, we have little grasp upon the Principle itself.
The reason for this is due to the ever changing of conditions, situations and circumstances and how we relate with those, in the moment. It is the reason why we can easily be swayed by fear, doubt and worry. Yet, it is the Principle itself which secures us most through all changing things regardles of how deep or long their measure. All that we attach and associate with the changes of conditions, situations and circumstances makes us blind of this most basic life long Principle.
Very very few adults now, here, are able to stay with and follow this commentary. It is not written in complicated, unfamiliar words.
They simply do not have the patience because their very locked down concepts / choices are blocking it.
For generations these didn't start happening until one's early twenties when young people were taking their first steps out into the world.
That has changed to great measure. The lock down mind set occurrs in younger people on a larger measure than ever before as dysfunctional families increased.
With the introduction of television, war came into our living rooms, dinner tables got replaced with folding TV tables and processed packaged frozen dinners have sold well since.
The forming elements of a child's mind deals with:
I Will - I Won't
I Shall - I Shall not
I Should - I Should not
I Could - I Could not
I Can - I Cannot
I Do - I Do not
I Want - I Need
Each is a process of exploring, testing, discovering and each of these can and often change throughout our life. While these are at play and acquiring experience in the young child's life,
there is an observer involved. Because that very observer changes identity as we get older, these forming elements become more difficult to set apart and define from one another. It is because they are based upon science, religion and philosophy, and is why they set up conflict not just within us, but with others as well. Yet, by their very origin, they are exactly the same. How they came about and an influence upon us, is exactly the same.
As we mature, we develop preferences: preferences for what we want and for what we want to avoid. Through our preference we become divided between our fear and our trust.
What is most amazing of all is the fact that this basic unchanging Principle of Trust can be easily given to a school child of age twelve. This is not theory, it is fact. There is a great difference in the meaning and application of Trust of something than Faith in something. While that Trust never wavers, faith does.
However, while there are many examples of this being given to a youngster, there are far greater numbers where it is not. This is demonstrated by the dysfunctional relationships in the majority of schools across the country. Co-dependent relationships are so embedded within the society, it is accepted, allowed, even encouraged within many businesses. It also becomes one of the most controversial.
If you were to take any part of what has been expressed here, and bring that part forward, as any one specific, it will most likely trigger conflict. So long as we have conflict ( question ) within us, we shall trigger and experience conflict ( question ) between us. All the while, The Principle of Trust is unaltered and identical within every individual. Always has and always will. Young people who do rise and succeed out of a ghetto are an example of .... The Principle.
The very process of Mastering a Craft ( or sport ) is directly related, be it a musical instrument, art, sculpture, wood working, basket ball, etc., anything involving vision, brain and hand. When that Mastering process is based in trust, it shall succeed . because it has what it takes to overcome outer challenges. If it is based in faith, it is questionable and can fail if challenged by conditions circumstances and situations. Again, the difference is so slight, yet always has to do with ... how we do the looking.
When and if you're ever able to let go and release the locked in concepts trapped within the word -brain-connections you've constructed ,... what will remain, pure and simple, is the correct answer to the question, " Who are you ?" All through your life, it's had different attachments and titles with meanings in your mind, most of which had to be released to be replaced by yet another. Behind it all, there is something that hasn't changed
As an infant, as a toddler, and so on. As a teen you identified with what? Wanted to be what ? Idolized who ? You chose to dress a certain way, act certain ways, and a lot more to gain a sense of self and also not to be left out. Those choices brought about particular results as well as challenges, some good, some not good. Choices all through our life, shape who we appear to be. The roles or parts we take on all make brain connections along the way. Sister, cheerleader, cousin, aunt, spouse, wife, school crossing guard, mother, in-law, club vice-president, grandma, and so on. Each is an attachment and has its brain connections. Each of these connections is as like a little light flashing on, “ This is ne,” “ This is me,” “ This is me,” There is not one that you have been for a time, that you did not become a part of, identified with, reacted and responded within.
You’ve made brain connections just being a male or female and what you think that is all about, through ever single one of the roles you’ve been in through your life. Well, it is a lot, and it is not without its hangups. Looking at yourself through the roles and stages of your life, is a way of “seeing” yourself you won’t by gazing in a mirror. You are looking at the parts, the roles, the choices, outcomes along with some old thoughts and feelings ... a t t a c h e d.
At this point you need to be introduced to another view of who you are. In Modern Psychology, life is divided into seven planes. There is no rigid reason why it is limited to these aspects except that they seem to cover all the important sides of experience. Knowledge of these planes is a most practical matter, for it is by their application that we can achieve a means of adjustment.
1. The Physical : food, clothing, things, shelter, matter substance.
2. The Actional: See, hear, touch, sensational, doing, going, moving, travels, sports, will-to-win.
3. The Emotional: Responsiveness, comfort, pleasure, companionship, communication, group.
4. The Intellectual: Thought, understanding, research, science, math, principles, knowledge.
5. The Ethical: Goodness, social service, law-order, co-operation, and concern.
6. The Aesthetic: Beauty, art, music, literature, poetry, drama, architecture, dance, creativity.
7. The Spiritual: Religion, the immortal values, philosophy, inspiration, guidance.
It is obvious that each of us lives on all of these seven planes, but we do not do so to an equal degree. We tend to accent some one of these seven planes, with a secondary interest in another, and only a casual concern for the rest. And, once again is the reminder that some one thing remains the same, undisturbed and unaltered, from birth to death, where herein it has been referred to as The Principle.
This Principle of which I’ve referred., I can’t just give to you. . It is impossible. I can only speak of it, .. for myself, just as I have. This same is as true for you. But be patient, just a while longer.
Your grasping it, getting it, understanding and using it, is what makes it possible for bringing us into, understanding, establishing and maintaining co-independent relationships, because we know what ... the Principle is,... what it does,... and how to use it. This is nothing new. It is as ancient as humanity and is what sets us apart from the animal, plant and mineral kingdoms upon this planet.
There are two ways you can directly connect with the Principle, for yourself and get a glimpse of this one thing which hasn’t changed through all you’ve done and been.
The first .. would have ( should have ) ( could have ) been put into place for you when you passed from elementary into middle school. It would have been presented to you by the parents or those who raised you. However, very very few parents can or could ever do this and you’ll understand why.
For me, this was incredibly rewarding. We joined together in June 1971 and have been with the team ever since. We have several others friends from this area, together, we experienced jobs lost, new jobs found, babies born, parents dying, friends surviving horrific accidents and other personal problems and triumphs. Against all odds, we did not flame out, we did not fumble and we did not dissolve into an amorphous mess. Our Alliance stands for the same values as the Monostoic Message did in 2011 and stayed this way not because of one autocratic leader (although Crowden recently set new bookmark standards…) but because we attract and retain people who think like us. In times of need (like at Snowmass 1984) this creates a very fast, unspoken trust and aligns behavioral patters. Communication during the siege was phenomenally disciplined for a team that doesn’t fly all that much with each other and at no point did anyone question the field leaders, overall strategy or tactics. Together, this gives me great confidence that our team will respond similarly when the proverbial manure hits the fan. I always assumed that our Brotherhood coalesces and comes together for a cause – now I know for sure.
If the following had been given to you upon the first day of your entering middle school, it would have had a profound influence upon the daily decisions and choices you made and not just in your school life.
“ From this day forward, through the rest of your schooling, your report card is none of our business. You alone know how the marks get on the cards: they represent the choices you make. Every school day you are present, you alone determine what you will and will not do.
You will not be rewarded for good marks, nor punished for bad. They are yours alone and are rewards or warnings for your choices. If you don’t like what you get, you alone know how to change it. Your homework is your business just as our responsibilities are for us to tend to. To do it or not is your choice the consequences of which are yours to be proud of or to suffer and straighten out. “
Having faith in a child is one thing. Placing a Trust into their care is quite another. And it is not anything like entrusting a puppy in their care.
Few parents have the courage to place this trust in their child, and not to touch it, ask how school is going, or if the homework got done. Think of it more like entrusting a paycheck deposit in the bank. Release it. You don’t call the bank every afternoon and ask, “ Is it still there ? “ If they have a question they will call you. If your child has a question, needs your input on something, wants your advice on what you would do, they will let you know.... if, they can trust your word. And there is the gem you earn by giving it, you gain it.
The child gains his own voice and dictate over his choices and their consequences from which to learn, for the rest of his life. They don’t have to run away from home, lie or cheat to gain .... the freedom to be responsible for their self, ... so frequently denied by parental dictate and demand.
It’s not easy because harsh choices attract harsh lessons which puts trust in oneself on the line. How else will you know you can stand up ... from a fall ? Here is where most parents run smack into their own Fear Factors.
In two words:: Own them ... those are yours. Your fears make the placing of trust... impossible.
How many times is that parental fear masked and paraded in repetitious phrases of, “ Because we care about you “ .” Because we love you.” How can a child become responsible if you don’t allow them to be responsible and I’m not talking about taking the trash out or reminding them to put “ feed the dog” on the chore chart.
Because Trust is the foundation and cornerstone, ... the Mastering Process begins when, where and with what and with whom ?
But, because this was not perhaps put into place for you when you were that age, the second way, is an exercise to do to the best you can. It will provide a “Hind Sight” glimpse, maybe for the first time, of what has been with you all your life, unchanged, unaffected, but always there, in place.
The exercise : The better you fulfill it, the clearer you will disconnect and release former brain connections and attachments, those things which have blocked and blinded you to your real and true sense of ....self. Herein lies your power, strength, wisdom and freedom.
You would not be what you are, where you are, unless you are, or were, in agreement with it.
To understand yourself, is started with, what you are and are not in agreement with and about yourself.
* * * * *
This has always and only been done in a classroom / workshop setting, where everyone is doing this exercise ... silently, to their self. When all are finished, then the final step is provided.
Here on line, the instructions can be simply read through ... without actually doing the exercise for putting the dynamic into place. Without it, this has been a total waste of your time.
With this said, a change is needed so each may have full opportunity “ to get it” , and have the experience for them self.
- - - - - - - - -
Those wanting to receive the Instructions, for completing this, are requested to: "Send Private Message " ... with the Subject: Instructions
( Access through clicking on my avatar ) You will receive the Instructions, to do at your leisure. With it, you'll receive a final instruction, ( what to do when you've completed the exercise.)
The final piece is in the form of a question. That is when you "get it " ... and release a lot of "old baggage", dictates and blocks.
“ No matter how vast your knowledge or modest, your own mind is that which has to acquire it. It is only with you own knowledge that you have to deal. “
Report Card Responsibility: A true life example -
The mother, raising the boy on her own, turned the responsibility of the report card over to the 12 year old when he entered middle school. Each day after school, he’d have to walk a fair distance to where the mother worked to have a ride home when she got off. Boys will be boys and a fair amount of mischief came into play, during the two hour wait, but nothing serious.
Two years later, when her job ended due to budget cut backs, they moved to another state. There he continued on in middle school, but had trouble adjusting and settling in. He’d express dislike for a teacher or a class from time to time. He was even suspended for a day or two for bad behavior. Mom, true to her word, never entered the situations,
only as an interested listening ear and a question or two such as, “ What do you think can change that and make it better ?”
Time passed and shortly after turning fifteen and entering high school, the boy got himself a job to earn money so he could start buying his own clothes. The job was with an older couple owned small hamburger restaurant. The couple had a great influence upon the boy through their training him to do a job and to do it well to its completion. A beautiful mutual respect developed and the job remained through high school.
It wasn’t too long after being hired and doing the job, that the boy wanted to get a bike for riding to and from school. The mother’s income, closely managed, covered the bills, food and necessities, with very little to spare.
Without her knowing until afterward, the boy made arrangements with a bike shop owner for purchasing a bike on a monthly payment plan, fulfilled the contract and got his bike.
Being given the responsibility, early on for his choices, he learned what is required to be a responsible adult and what it takes to do the job before you, the very best you can. This young man is proud of the person he has chosen to be. He built that. No one can take it away. He was given the freedom to follow his own inner conscious by a mother who knew she could trust it,... because she’d learned early in life, to trust her own.
NOTE: This is the last post necessary to this thread,
and therefore is being closed.