Been Here A Day...why Haven't I Sold Anything Yet?

She forgot to disclose the fine print of Fine Art America before she coaxed you into signing up? Tsk tsk.....lol

Lol I take it Angel has kept you in the loop about what goes on here...

Yeah, she was all "Just sign up, post a pic, make money."

I've so been duped.

Have another beer.

-W

Not a problem. You just have to print up a bunch of the PDF sales sheets for each image and leave them lying around at Octoberfest. (Sorry, you'll have to wait til next year for your next try since that's the only time big-time art buyers drink beer.)

have several while you wait. :)

W...I AM! In fact, today is International Stout Day, so I'm currently enjoying a Lion Stout from Sri Lanka to commemorate the day. =)

Excellent idea, John. However, each sheet of paper is like .08 cents each, and that really cuts into my overhead of "not wanting to spend a single dime until I sell at least 10 prints". So that is just not going to work. Oh, and drunks don't know how to read. It is known.

Its just nobody likes that brand of beer.

keep drinking different brews and posting the images until one sells. Granted you might have your salary wrapped up in micro brews, but its the price you must pay...

I agree with Bradley, drink and post. On a related note, there's a school of thought on faa that you will start selling once you've reached about 500-600 images. Chug-a-lug, my friend!


-W

Bradley, are you saying that not only do I need more than ONE option for customers to choose from, but that further "research" for different photos may be needed?

Nope, complete bollocks. There's your one photo. It's terrificly wonderful (just ask me), and everyone should want that one. I'm done. Gonna just kick back and wait for the riches to roll in so I can finally get that miniature giraffe I've always wanted (friggin' Russians can't have all the opulence).

If you really want to make some cash. Buy her that new camera she has been asking for!! lol
FAA should hire her. If she got you to sign up= no interview needed!!

Kyle, here's something uplifting. All that beer you drink for your photos should be tax-deductible. Check with your accountant.

Cheers!!

Oh Patricia, that's positively DEVIOUS! Gonna have to look into that!

If you drink enough "props" you won't give a damn that you aren't selling any prints!

In fact, that may make a fun experiment.

Drink one, take a picture.
Drink another, take a picture.
Etc.

Then we can check the quality of the images as the number of beers increases!

Don't drink and shoot. (that applies for more than one kind of shooting).

I like Angel's avatar better.......sorry, Kyle.............it's a 'girl' thing..........maybe try some wine.......?

That sounds like the seeds of an interesting project, John.

A series of photos of an increasing number of beer bottles, each shot taken and post-processed immediately after drinking the beer in the last bottle added.

I see a coffee table book in somebody's future. Or maybe a blog or live-tweet.

*snort*

Frankly, mate, you've got your pricing wrong. If you need $60,000 a year then you should price it at about $240,000 for the smallest size. That way, when it DOES sell, you won't need to sit worrying about making ends meet until the next sale. Also, this is the art world: price things low and people will think you don't value them, put a big price on it and people will fall over themselves to have one. Think marketing!
Now, where's my beer?

I'm pretty sure there's no way Angel is letting me get sloshed and have access to a camera. Make of that what you will.

When you are in England, remind me to take you to our local brewery for a tasting

I think in your 700 bottles of beer on the wall series, you need to do a self portrait each day after you drink the beer, and in the descriptions include the daily count, the total count, your rating of that particular brand of beer, and the sports score of the game you watched during your libation. You need these additional statistics to add the kind of sophistication that today's art consumer requires for conceptual/performance art of this kind. But your aesthetic mileage may vary. Maybe you should get a blood alcohol meter (the blow thru kind, I suppose) and include the reading of your blood alcohol level, as well. It's not recommended, but if you insist on drinking and driving, be sure to use a dash cam as well to document the total experience.

When Angel and I finally make it to England someday, you can bet on it!

hey kyle,god will hear your cry oneday you will make the money on time,keepit up

The best you can do is to make prices for every size and material universal,let say 1000 usd.
Otherwise you'll be discouraged by earning 47 dollars per piece.
Because of that I just delayed purchase of your definitely unforgettable art.

Ha!

I didn't think you were going to join! =P

Good job mentioning that you have NO sales on the first day.

Ya. I think we should start keeping the beer receipts.

I think you should put your handsome face in that avatar box.
It may help you sell.

Welcome to FAA!

Dude . . . tweet it out.

And denoise. You need more denoise.

Amateur . . .

Funny. We were talking about reducing the noise in his photos, but I don't have a program specifically for noise reduction. I tried to work with one of his images in a regular editing program and I wasn't satisfied with how much detail was lost in order to reduce the noise.

@Kyle,

Empty bottles of 20 year old single malt scotch sell like hotcakes on here! leave the beer to the amateurs. If you want the big bucks stick with the $150 bottles of scotch. Money attracts money!

LOL Kyle, Welcome aboard!!! :)

hysterical...

Lightroom has good noise reduction, topaz has seriously good noise reduction...imho and experience with way more noise than you have here! Topaz denoise can be purchased by itself and used as a plug-in, plugs in tooooo....well, check the specs, it plugs into several programs.

edit: you can recover some detail in topaz too and in lightroom.

See Kyle, you're participating and already had 48 views, just on that one lonely bottle, yep, needs some friends!

You need to do a blog and figure out how to make money with it, 'cuz you're quite entertaining, lol! Poor Angelina, you AND teenagers allll together now!

=D



Oh yes, Shana, I have filled him in.

Greg...that was very well thought out...have you had that plan brewing for awhile?

Welcome. Kyle!

It's really all about the bots. You have to get those little guys to visit...and visit often. Once they start coming around, give them a pint of your best. They tend to travel in packs, and if you can get them a bit tipsy (one for you...one for the bots etc.) who know what might happen, Sober bots are a little cheap of you ask me, but....drunk bots....We all might get a sale or two! That's the real secret around here!

Enjoy,

Matt

Thanks for the warm welcomes. Got a few more up...primarily outdoor shots (those naturally tended to have significantly less noise so they made for quick and easy uploads). Aaaaaaand...with that many photos now, I fully expect to be wealthy enough to just go ahead and buy FAA outright by the end of the month. Happy Thanksgiving indeed!

I'll buy everyone a round once that happens. Go ahead and wait for it.

I thought this was a joke at first. Great stuff. Just in time for the holiday shopping season!

Well, Craig...ya got me. The sentiment of the initial post is indeed a bit tongue-in-cheek. However, my photography is quite real and quite for sale. Tell all your beer-loving friends! =)

Millions, if not billions of photographs are onsale online.
You must devise a strategy whereby your images rise
(like the bubbles in champagne?) to the surface so
coming to the attention of the buyers of art out there.

Enter competitions - inaugurate competitions. Have as
many sites online stacked with your stuff e.g. flickr, 500px,
artfreelife, Google+, facebook, photographyblog, smugmug,
zenfolio, world-photography-organisation, hdrspotting, pinterest,
pixoto, digital-photography-school, seen-by, photographytalk
- I could go on... !

Also, curate a group on faa or flickr or G+ - again people
wandering by to see what your group/community contains
oftentimes check-out your art too! I have noticed that some
people exhibit an artistic sensibility not so much in their
published art, but in their re-posting of the gems and jewels
they find in other postings - such notables in that school
include Jaycee Crawford, and Marilyn Alejandro (not on faa)
With such auspicious sensibilities on display, I was
motivated to consider their own art (as well as the re-posts)
which was not unremarkable.

Oh, and invite others for a beer! :)

Cheers and enjoy FAA ;) good luck with the combination of beer and picture selling
( LOL Richard :D )

You are lucky you are married to my photo editor. I would be lost without your wife. hope you get more photo's of beer to make your chances better in selling here. Welcome to FAA Kyle and our little community here :)

Excellent all around. Get back to us when that sale happens so we can all go cry into our own beer.

"...I have a question: I've had one photo up for a couple of hours now and I still haven't sold a single print. Just exactly how long does it take? I'm lookin' to make some crazy stupid money off this one photo (enough to replace my previous $60k/yr full-time job),.."


LOL

HA!

Well done

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Oooops, sorry, my keyboard must have gotten stuck in the ya gotta be kiddin me mode. :)

RE: HAL
haahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaahahahahahahahaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahhahaahahahahahah backatcha

Kyle,
Now is the time to call your family and beg them to buy a print or two of yours. Fine Art America has a few favorites that they promote. The rest of us are here to use this site as our online photo club. Get used to it. We are here to help Fine Art America make money, not the other way around,

Kyle...it'll be any minute now! Just sit back and relax. Nothing further you need to do :) (you and Angel are the cutest couple!)

Day two, anything yet????

LOL

Welcome Kyle!!

Cheers, Barbara
Saint Jean Arts

Double Cheers! Mary

Lol. Not yet.

We are taking a trial run of the Nik suite.

He is out taking another shot, with his phone and my dslr.

Let the games begin.

No, Barbara...two days in and not a single sale. Only conclusion I can come to is that it's all just COMPLETE GARBAGE and that I am perhaps the worst photographer ever to disgrace the realm of soul-stealing. I'm just gonna delete my account and bemoan my ill fortune across the interwebs, slandering the name of FAA in the process because this site obviously doesn't work.

Woe to those who ARE selling anything, for they've apparently sold their souls to the Nine Hells and in service of Cthulu, having sacrificed any number of infant puppy cats in order to broker such a deal. Woe to ye, sir and/or ma'am. WOE TO YE!

I made a sale yesterday, I don't recall selling my soul to anyone. ;)

WOOOOOOEEEEE!!! Especially ye who flagrantly flaunt such fortunes upon my flawed and failed faculties!

LOL, too funny LOL....

We will all need a beer when you sell your one and only master piece!!! LOL

WOOOOEEEE!! the games have begun...

Cheers, Barbara
Saint Jean Arts

Kyle,

Have a beer and call us in the morning, there will be bluebirds over the cliffs of Littleton by then.All will be well and the course of your life will continue along the happy road to personal fulfillment.

Kyle, you are a genius who knows how to use the web for promotion - you will go far! Love the photo series too, btw ;-)
PS - Try Dogfish Head Brewery for some of the best beer in the land, imho...

Hey Kyle I also sold one today. :) Stick around it's bound to happen for you as well. :)

again...........hysterical..........

There is no easy way,
you'll have to double your portfolio before you'll see any action.

Seriously, here is what you do. Keep drinking beer but simply have your wife create a gallery under her profile. Name it: Beer Fund Gallery. She has the search engine thing down to a science. Piggy back off her longevity. lol

If you start drinking cheaper beer you won't have to worry about making as many sales.

...but seriously, whoever mentioned the blog idea above is on to something. You obviously have a love for beer, blogging about it would be a great way to expose your work to your niche market.

Welcome to FAA, and best of luck to you!

It take me a while to understand that this is a Joke right? Sorry about my understanding in English LOL.

To-Tam Gerwe