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The days that followed

Timothy Bulone

Blog #25 of 249

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June 28th, 2015 - 02:08 PM

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The days that followed

Tarnish and texture, I add these elements to some of my work. I find that it gives an aged appearance. It makes them seem more realistic, more lived-in, more distressed . It's not a coincidence, that in the moments of my real life when I feel distressed I feel tarnished and textured, the textures seem cumulative in the form of worry lines and ever graying hair. Life has its moments of drama that change me, and it shows. My world is no longer shiny and new. That doesn't mean I have given up, I still find wonder in the most marvelous places (and I am better at finding it now than I ever have been). But I also recognize that life changes despite my feelings about it. Growing accustomed to these changes is what I am learning now. And I'm getting average marks, I'd say.

I ran into an old friend recently. We talked about our shiny and new days and the days that have followed for each of us. He asked me if I was happy and I said that I struggle with balance, with keeping myself right side up when I feel so upside down sometimes. But we both know that life is sometimes spent upside down and that we can still be okay even if we are. My friend Esther would tell me that acknowledging it is sometimes all that is needed. So I tell myself, "Oh, here I am, feeling upside down again." And then I carry on, noting that I will eventually be right side up. And knowing that it doesn't have to stay one way or the other makes it a little easier each time.

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