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Dont Look Back

Blog: #3 of 7 by D Rogale

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Don’t Look Back
This morning I got up and went to my studio, ready to get come things done. I immediately realized I needed to pick up a few items at the store before starting, so I went out and started my truck, and then came back inside to brush my teeth and grab my coat. Just as I was closing the door behind me to leave, I heard my truck (her name is Stella), sputter and choke out. I had ran out of gas at my own house!
I must’ve spent 10-15 minutes being frustrated, angry, and upset before even thinking about what I was going to do. It was hard to get over how mad I was! I finally decided to grab my gas can and walk in the cold a whole 2 blocks to the gas station and get it over with. As I was walking my mind calmed a little and one of my basic life beliefs occupied my spirit. It is my conviction that whatever happens to me in this life is for my greater good (whether I presently understand it or not), or it’s not about me at all so get over it and don’t take it personally.
This belief has helped me through a lot of tough situations, so this little gaffe was a piece of cake. Still it got me thinking about loss or disappointment, and how much time we spend holding on to something, someone, or some ideal that is clearly NLA (no longer available). While grief over loss is normal, and there are five documented stages of it, I propose a 6th stage before you can say you have properly grieved your loss: EXCITEMENT!
I say excitement because I know that the universe hates a vacuum and loves balance. It won’t leave a whole where something used to be, and if one event, loss, has already occurred, then its counterpart, gain, must be right around the corner. So don’t look back! The only thing that you can accomplish by looking back is prolonging your sadness and delaying your blessing.
As I released my frustration and accepted my fate this morning, grabbing the gas can and starting my walk, I thought that it really is a good thing to start you day with some exercise, and smiled. I was smiling when I got to the corner where a man was waiting to cross, and when he saw my smile he smile. We chatted, I told him what happened, we laughed, and then he asked if I was late for work. I told him what I did, and showed him some of my paintings I have photos of in my phone, and he immediately starts asking about Christmas gifts! We exchanged numbers, and as we did my cornerstone belief winked at me and said: “Just chill, I got this”. Am I glad I ran out of gas? YES! Was I 30 minutes ago? No way!

I’ve lost a lot of things in my life, friends, jobs, possessions, loves, opportunities, and the list goes on. In fact, the only thing I haven’t lost yet is my life, but when that happens I hope to still have this attitude: Don’t look back! Don’t hold on to something that is already gone, making what could be a beautiful transition to your next chapter messy and more painful than necessary. Let it go and look forward, believing that your time has come to receive something better. I guarantee you won’t be disappointed. ~D. Rogale

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